Self Improvement Archives

 

Increase Your Self Confidence With These 5 Strategies

We all know them. You know the ones, those self-confident individuals who always seem to be in control.

They make snap decisions, appear to be more successful than most people, and possess an inner strength that is almost visible.

You admire their self-assurance and firmness of opinion.

Such characteristics arise from inner beliefs in one’s ability.

selfconfidence

If you would like to be more self-assured, practice the following tips which can help you formulate a strong, healthy self-image, full of conviction and self-confidence.

1 – Understand Your Strengths… and Weaknesses

Self-confident people know what they are good at, and what they are not very good at.

Confidence definitely means feeling good about your ability to do certain things. However, it also means understanding those areas where you need to improve.

A confident person readily accepts they are not the best at everything.

2 – Look On the Positive Side

Bad things happen all the time. You need look no further than your daily news broadcast to see that the world has a lot of problems.

Self-assured individuals understand this. However, they do not focus on the negative side of life. They can always find the silver lining in every cloud, and a positive spin on a negative event.

3 – Don’t Let Failure Stop You

A failure is an event, it is not you are.

The most successful, self-assured individuals with true conviction in their beliefs and abilities have failed hundreds and even thousands of times.

They are not scared of a failure, and certainly don’t let it keep them from succeeding in the future. Norman Bernard Larsen invented WD-40 on his 40th try. The world would not benefit from this all-in-one miracle household product today if Larson had given up on his 10th, or 20th, or 39th attempt.

4 – Spend Time with Positive People

Confident people surround themselves with other confident people.

These people tend to be positive as opposed to negative in nature. Their self-belief is contagious, and makes people want to be around them.

boostingmentalandemotionalhealth

Boosting Mental and Emotional Health

Negative people want to bring others down to their level, and positive, self-assured individuals spend time with confident believers in self-convictions that push them to be more of who they are.

5 – Use the Right Body Language

You can “trick” your mind into believing that you are self-confident.

This will lead to confident, assured actions and behaviors.

Pull your shoulders back. Stand erect. Look people in the eye. Practice good posture. Don’t slouch. Shake hands firmly. Smile more often. Speak slowly and clearly.

These are all traits of self-confident people, and simply by adopting these postures and confidence boosting tips, you will begin to feel more self-assured.

How To Start Living In The Present

The Power Of Living In The Present

Most of us are so consumed by the past and the future that we forget to live in the present.

Living in the present may sound like a New Age concept, but it can be one of the most powerful tools for living your best life.

Most of us live our lives like we need to be constantly doing something to achieve success.

Each of us has our own definition of success and what we need to accomplish to achieve it.

Many look at becoming a doctor, veterinarian, dentist, banker or lawyer as achieving success.

However, there are many unhappy people out there that have reached that level of education.

Veterinarians are reported to be at the top of the list for the profession most likely to commit suicide.

The drive to constantly do something makes us distracted and keeps us so focused on the daily grind that we have little time for relaxation, de-stressing, or self-development.

The desire to stay busy and succeed can be influenced by trying to keep up with the success of others. The constant desire to make more money, acquire the latest, biggest or the prettiest keeps us distracted from recognizing what is really important in our lives.

Trying to have more material things frequently leads to a life of debt, forcing us to remain in this vicious cycle just to pay the bills.

The fear of losing everything if we slow down or refuse to see one more client can make us feel stuck and unable to change.

If you want to make a personal transformation, you will have to make a decision to start living in the present, so that you can regain your personal power and start living fully in the present.

Until you quit living in the past you will always have trouble living fully in the present.

3 Steps to Being a Better You

3 Steps to Being a Better You 

I am sure that no matter where you are in life or what you have accomplished you are constantly looking for ways to improve yourself or do things better.

There is no shortage of advice on how we can improve ourselves. This advice comes in many forms including mentoring, seminars, books, reports, articles and videos.

There is so much advice available as the net has evolved that it can be overwhelming trying to decide what you should spend your time on and what advice to follow.

If you took the time to follow everything you should be doing in self improvement, getting more productive, creating the life you want, you would probably have little time left to do anything else.

I am a big believer in taking any goal and breaking down the steps needed to achieve that goal. Then approaching things one step at a time until you achieve the desired end result.

The following is a step by step approach to being a better you:

Step 1

You really can’t make improvement in yourself until you understand what you need to improve on.

It is imperative that you know where you are and where you ultimately want to be.

So the first step is to make a list.

You need to make a 2 column or 3 column list.

The first column is what you want to change.

The second column is what you want the end result to be.

In the third column put the benefits of achieving the end result.

Listing the benefits can be very motivating in your quest to achieve your goals.

Step 2

Chose the most important item on your list to start working on.

Save your list, once you accomplish one thing you’ll want to go back and work on more, but for now, choose one thing.

If a bad habit is something you want to change, you will need to start working on breaking that habit.

If you want to be a friendlier person, you can start by smiling at more people. You don’t have to run out and start a conversation with everyone, but do start smiling more.

If you want to be more productive, exchange some of your free time and use it for work time. If that’s not something you’re willing to give up, then cut down on social media time and spend that extra time working.

Step 3

Work on this item consistently for a month.

It will take time to replace old habits with new ones, but you have to keep at it.

You may want to start journaling your daily progress to keep yourself in check.

Whatever ways you can come up with to start being a better you, do it.

Once you’ve consistently worked on this one thing for a month, go back to your list and add another item to start working on.

Don’t forget to keep up your new habit with the other things you’ve already changed.

It’s much easier to work on one thing, get good at it and then add one more thing. It’s a bit like juggling. When a person starts learning to juggle, they start with one pin or one ball. They get used to feel of it before adding a second pin or ball. They practice with that for a few weeks and then add a third ball or pin.

The key is to start mastering one thing before you add others.

Making positive changes in your life isn’t always easy, but if you follow this step by step, really simple plan, you will see results.

Self improvement requires a plan of action.

If you want to start being a better you, you need to plan.

Start making your plan, today….

 

 

 

 

 

 

If I Knew Then What I Know Now

 

 

 

 

happinessIf I Knew Then What I Know Now

I was recently thinking about the concept of success.

I am not referencing the kind of success defined by how many material things you have acquired, the balance of your bank account, the number of diploma’s on the wall, or degree’s behind your name.

The question that came to mind was what has to happen for someone to feel they are having a successful relationship with you. This may include your relationship with a customer, the relationship of a doctor and patient, or relationships with your family, spouse, or other loved ones.

I was once told that a patient will tell you what is wrong with them if you just take the time to listen.  

The concept of listening can be invaluable in determining the direction our lives may take.

What do people really need to consider their time with you a success?

I suspect the responses could fill many pages if a poll was taken. Everyone may have multiple points that they consider vital for a relationship of any kind to florish.

In my opinion the most critical steps anyone must take to make a relationship a success can be reduced to the following four points:

1. Listen-pay attention to what the other person is telling you. Don’t just hear them, listen to what they are really saying. We should spend most of our time with another just listening. Only then do you have the permission to give your opinion about the issues presented.
God gave us the gift of two ears and a mouth so use them appropriately. Take the time to crawl into someone else’s world and find out what makes them who they are.

 

2. Compassion- show a sincere interest in anothers problems, desires, wants, and needs. Let them know you care and have their best interest at heart. Give them confidence that you will do what you can to help them achieve what they want or relieve their suffering.

 

3. Empathy- take the time to listen and understand where the other person is coming from. Why they feel the way they do. What has happened in their life that created the thoughts and idea’s that make them who they are, today. What trials and tribulations have influenced how this person responds to different situations.

 

4. Trust- if you want to have the optimal relationship, of any kind, you have to develop trust. The other individual involved needs to feel secure in revealing themselves to you. This all starts with just listening, understanding their situation and demonstrating a sincere interest in helping them find a solution to their problems or obtaining something they desire.

Let the other person know they are safe with you and nothing will come between you. That you are a team and together you will find a solution to their problems and concerns.

Some conversations with others are filled with conflict and quickly spiral out of control. If you find someone is attacking you for what you say or stand for it is time to take a deeper look at what is creating the hostility. Frequently hostility arises out of poorly understood intentions.

They may not feel you have their best interest at heart.

You need to find out what the deeper commitment is that is driving this person to push you. If you take the time to stop and say “I think I am not understanding where you are coming from or why you feel the way you do” it will give them the oppurtunity to explain. Finding common commitments will make you both more at ease and allow you to ressolve differences and move forward. This will result in a more productive and rewarding relationship.

Most conflicts in life and relationships arise out of someone having unfullfilled expectations, unressolved intentions, or undelivered communication with another.

Get your cards out on the table. Let people know up front what they can and cannot expect from you.

If you want to move forward in your own life, keep the debri cleared out of your way.

If you have something on your mind or someone has done something that is eating at you bring it up to the one involved.

Let them know you want to get this out in the open, and all you want them to do is listen. This will help you clear your mind and allow you to continue moving forward with a more rewarding life.

If you do nothing else, do the following:

Actively listen
Show compassion, be generous
Understand to be understood
Crawl into their world
Find anothers commitment to words, recognize common commitments
Build trust one conversation at a time

If you make these steps a part of you daily life, in dealing with others, you will change the outcome and quality of your life.

Starting today, listen to what another is try to tell you, take the time to understand, offer to help find a solution, and build trust.

Follow the above with all of your heart and people will do anything they can for you.

You have to give something before you can expect anything in return.

Then you will never have to say……….if only I knew then.

 

Kindness Comes In All Different Sizes

Kindness comes in all different sizes

Kindness Comes In All Different Sizes

Kindness Comes In All Different Sizes

When making choices in your life, choose to be kind. 

The following is a short story about the choices we make when dealing with others.
A 9 year-old boy entered a hotel café and sat at a table. A waitress put a glass of water in front of him.

“How much is an ice cream sundae?” the little boy inquired.

“One dollar,” said the waitress.

The little boy pulled his hand out of his pocket and considered the coins he had. “Well, how much is a plain dish of ice cream?” he asked.

By now, more individuals were waiting for a table and the waitress was growing really impatient. “seventy five cents,” she brusquely replied.

The little boy once more counted his coins. “I’ll have the plain ice cream,” he stated.

The waitress brought the ice cream, put the bill on the table and walked off.

The boy finished the ice cream, paid the cashier and left.

When the waitress came back, she started to cry. As she wiped down the table, there placed neatly alongside the empty dish were two dimes and five pennies. You see, he couldn’t have the sundae as he had to have enough money to leave her a tip.

Be kind as you never realize the thoughts of others.

When you have a choice, choose to be kind.

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